Telling Someone to Smile will Never Make Them Happy

Smile! What’s wrong? Are you okay? What happened?

I don’t walk around with a smile pasted on because:

  • I feel phony wearing a fake smile
  • I’m not high
  • I’m not secretly plotting your demise and smiling about it
  • I am plotting your demise (and smiling to myself)
  • I’m thinking
  • I’m very content on the inside, and that doesn’t require smiling on the outside
  • I’m tired
  • I don’t like you
  • pretending to like you makes my face hurt
  • I’m heavily medicated
  • I am not awake yet
  • I am desperately unhappy and just waiting for you to tell me to smile because that will fix me right up!

Well, you get the point.

There is nothing “wrong” with me, I am okay and nothing happened. These questions imply that something is wrong with my face. How rude! I earned this face, the hard way…..endless worry and constant thinking.  I smile when I feel like it. Deal with it. If one more person tells me to smile, I will spontaneously combust.

The truth is that years of anxious thoughts have left me with the frown lines that cause Resting Bitch Face. So when I am at peace, and all is well, my face betrays me and I look unhappy. It’s just my face! Lots of things can cause frown lines to appear, such as:

  • frowning
  • anger
  • bright sun or lights
  • smoking
  • thinking
  • anxiety
  • age
  • sadness
  • actually being a bitch or a jackass

 

If you see someone walking around smiling for no reason, be afraid. Something is wrong, they are not okay, and something is going to happen. Run!

norman_bates_creepy_smile

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